Me: Huh? What thing? Are you talking about my retainer?
Her: Yes, that thing - the retainer. You need to start wearing it again - your bottom teeth are starting to get crooked.
Me: Huh? I haven't had that retainer for almost 40 years - I either swallowed it during my sleep or the bed ate it - before I went to college the first time when I was 17!
Her: You need to get to the dentist and get a new one. Your teeth are so white and beautiful - it's a shame to let that go!
Me: Are you serious? I'm 56 years old - I'm not going back to the orthodontist. I cut my bangs.
Her: Good, I don't know why you insist on wearing your hair so long. At least I can see your eyes.
Conversation occurred within an hour and a half of my arrival into see my Mom in June. I like it when she clears the air so quickly - just go ahead and get all the issues out there. Gives us the rest of my visit to deal with all the other critical things in our lives…
